On Not Getting What You Want
A few thoughts that help me survive it, and maybe they'll help you too.
Sometimes I struggle with not getting what I want. I become a petulant toddler, making a scene and hoping the universe takes notice and changes its mind. And no matter how much practice I get, it hasn’t become easy.
Even though I’m still learning, I wanted to share a couple of thoughts that help me soothe the disappointment (or devastation!) depending on the day.
First: you know when you are rewatching a movie or TV show with someone and it’s the stressful part? You see the other person getting all riled up or devastated by the events, but you don’t have the same emotional attachment because you know what happens next. You know how it resolves. You know the happy ending? That’s how I like to zoom out. Often when we're in the thick of a plotline, we're worried this is where it ends. In reality, we're only on chapter 10 out of 90.
I have no foresight into what will happen, but that’s exactly when I try to remember all the times I didn’t get what I wanted only to get something better. It’s happened, a lot. So much so that now a ‘no’ makes me excited when I try to think of what could possibly be better. I like to think that I’ve been knocking on the wrong door and life is preventing me from having an underwhelming, mediocre existence. I try to understand that timing plays a role and that maybe a “no” is actually a “not yet.”